Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry beaudacious hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(310): View more from California

i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.

Fav 4 943 2409
share tweet
(860): View more from Connecticut

but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers

Fav 32 3275 1547
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(301): View more from Maryland

I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.

Fav 12 1536 2934
share tweet
(517): View more from Michigan

hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?

Fav 9 4869 1304
share tweet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(618): View more from Illinois

I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?

Fav 11 1568 3488
share tweet
(702): View more from Nevada

He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...

Fav 5 1140 2786
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(250): View more from British Columbia

How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??

Fav 9 2356 1194
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(770): View more from Georgia

Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.

(404): View more from Georgia

Good luck

(770): View more from Georgia

Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes

Fav 3 1059 635
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(207): View more from Maine

my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain

Fav 0 27 2
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT