We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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