He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
