Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Quick, to the slutcave!
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Randomize
