I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
