I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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