it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
YAS. BRING CRAB.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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