Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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