Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Randomize
