Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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