Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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