I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
