at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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