spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize
