Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Randomize
