Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
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