The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
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