She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Randomize
