either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
Randomize
