i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
