shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
