I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
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