none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
this morning i woke up under the kitchen table. i went to my room and there was an inflatable whale in my bed with a banana duct taped to where its penis should be. there were trails of cheez-its around my apartment and i found $67 in the crotch of my underwear. im guessing i had a very happy birthday.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
