hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Randomize
