More tranny stories later!
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
