when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
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It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
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Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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