where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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