my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
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