drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
i think my cat just said my name.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Randomize
