I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
I got her a Nickelback box set.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Randomize
