wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
