it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
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