Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize
