I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
This can only be settled by a dance off.
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