Already got asked if we're dating
Sponge bath it is.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Randomize
