I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
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