last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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