Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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