Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
