awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Randomize
