I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
