i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
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