He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
