His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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