I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
