Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
