Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
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