Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize
