omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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