I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Randomize
