Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
