Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
Randomize