whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
